Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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