is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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