Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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