I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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