is your mom at the bar?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize