im gay
i know
yea but for you.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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