I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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