No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
