she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
