I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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