R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Randomize
