Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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