Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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