do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
zippers are such a cool invention
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
