did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
