everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
