ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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