How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
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You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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