turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
