New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
wow bdsm is so cute
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize