At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Randomize
