Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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