he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
