We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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