I just pynch a tree in the face
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
