I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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