He told me they were just razor bumps!
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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