I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
