Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
