Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
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just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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