ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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