the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
even my farts smell like vagina
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize