So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize