She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I cut my penus on the lid.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I am naked and annoyed.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
