Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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