I want you more than these girls want KFC
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
