They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
