Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I just forgot I was standing up.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
