he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
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I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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