Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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