you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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