I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
