I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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