I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
