This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
