its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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