I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
