Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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