I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
