strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
you never un-have a 4some
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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